You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Small penises have feelings too.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
