You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
The air taste purple.
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