I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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