I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
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