Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Randomize