You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
