Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
The power of my boobs compel you
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
