I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
