The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
