just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
