we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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