After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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