and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
