I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
