i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
