U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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