Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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