are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize