so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
