Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
