Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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