are you so shy because you have an std?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Randomize