Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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