I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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