First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
