brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Actions speak louder than pants.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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