gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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