haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
