was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
i've created a new STD.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
