But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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