I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
