what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Boobs are out for the taking
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize