gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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