found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
