he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
She needs sedatives and a leash
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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