Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
