Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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