They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Randomize