speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
pray to the hookup gods
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize