Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
