# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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