What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize