she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Just puked most of my soul out..
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