fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize