Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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