Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
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