Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize