they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
