i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
