A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
