SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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