You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
